Between Barack and a Dalton place...

At least maybe he can act presidential...

http://link.brightcove.com/services/link/bcpid494808731/bctid716052875

Learn To Drive People!!

1: If you're being passed on the right side you're in the wrong lane. I don't care if you're eventually going to turn left.

2: The center lane of a 3 or 5 lane highway is for people turning left onto a side street, it is not a merge lane for people too impatient to wait for a safe interval to pull onto the highway.

3: I know my motorcycle is less than 3 ft wide -- I still have the right to the entire lane, you aren't allowed to squeeze past me because I have to wait to turn left (although if a motorcylist starts trying to skip traffic by driving on the shoulder or between cars, I think you have every right to stick something out your window and whack him with it as he goes by!)

4: If you are to unsure of your abilities to drive the speed limit, you probably shouldn't be on that road anymore.

5: The only reason I let you cut in front of me is because my truck is new and in great condition -- several years from now, when it's old and beat up, I will just run you over with it. Keep that in mind.

6: 20+ years of motorcycle riding have taught me to assume that everyone is trying to run into me. Do me a favor and prove me wrong for a change.

More from the Onion...

Anna Nicole Smith Finally Reaches Target Weight

NASSAU, BAHAMAS—Some weight-loss experts do not find Smith's achievement inspirational, claiming that such drastic dieting can lead to a dangerous loss of muscle mass.

Yes, I know the story is tasteless and tacky. So is the media's obsession over her death. She was a stripper with fake boobs, no shame, and no discernable talent -- who managed to somehow draw more attention to herself than she deserved. Then she went and pissed it all away.

What is there to obsess about in that?

TGIF

Friday's are the night I close the store -- not that I want to particularly, but Erin deserves a night off at least once a week. She's still young, and weekend nights are something she's more apt to enjoy. I've found having Friday mornings off useful for taking care of business. Today I went to the dentist and had my temporary crown fitted. Then I went out and paid some bills, went to the accountant and signed our tax returns, bought stuff to change the oil in both motorbikes, then went to work. Then the dam broke and I spent the next hour trying to catch up with the sudden deluge of customers who showed up when Erin went to lunch. Oh well, she gets hit from time to time too. I've got another hour or so to go, then I get to go home too.

Have a nice weekend...

Say hello to my little friend...

Yes, it's another myspace post...

Friends -- the whole point of Myspace. At this point I have six -- although it's probably safe to say the likelihood of me actually being friends with Wierd Al Yankovich are pretty slim. But he has a site, I have a site, and since I like his stuff (Albuquerque is on my page mp3 player, and it was playing as I started this post) I added him. I also really dig the Veggie Rocks -- I've always been a fan of Veggietales, and I think their renditions of some of the tunes seriously rock. There's also the ubiquitous Tom -- the system guy who welcomes you to Myspace -- everyone has him, all 160 million of us. The other 3 are people I actually know -- my buddy Jimmy, my brother-in-law Clint, and girl I knew from High School, Sharon. I've had invites from other people, but when I went to look at their profiles it was either ipods or porn. I'm not particularly interested in either one, and I'm certainly not adding them to my list -- it would be more advertising for them. But some people seem to be friend collectors -- accepting every add regardless of who they are and what they want.

I prefer quality over quantity...

I should have done this a long time ago...

I was out last evening on the new bike -- the sun was out, the air was warm (the wind was a little high, but liveable). I turned onto Baltimore and ran the bike up through the gears and just cruised. Nice mellow rumbling from the back, smooth ride, I looked down at the speedo -- 55MPH. If I'd been on the old KZ305 the motor would have been wailing, the bars would have been buzzing, and I would have known exactly how fast I was going.

I like this new way better...

Wylde Hogz!

First off, they did finish my bike yesterday, and it purrs like a kitten. Or rather, it purrs like a very large kitten with big long teeth, and a tendency to growl loudly from time to time. The biggest improvement was the total lack of backfiring, and a greatly reduced amount of vibration. Even the new hand grips felt better. Hopefully, as the weather improves, we'll be able to attack the garage full o' stuff, and get our vehicles inside (and my bike nearby, instead of in a storage room in town).

Now to the post title: Yes, me and the missus went to see Wild Hogs. The wife thought it would be amusing, now that I too am a Harley Owner. It was an OK movie I suppose, but it came straight out of the City Slicker playbook. Heck, change the names of the characters, substitute "Horse" for "Harley" and it pretty much does it. The film relied a bit to much on homo-erotic humour -- and seeing the bikes crashing (even if it was only a Sportster) was a little un-nerving to a guy who just spent 10K on a 12 year old bike. It was nice to see Marisa Tomei in a film again, and I liked William Macy. I suppose the only performance I thought was goofy was Travolta's -- the guy has to be one of the most uneven performers around. It's an OK film for a matinee, but I don't think I'd have paid full price to see it.

Back in the saddle again...

I finally got the parts for my bike! I dropped them off at the shop doing the work last night and they said they should be finished today. The guy I bought it from kept saying how proud I'll be about that bike -- well so far it's just been kind of embarrassing. There was a very nice day a couple of weekends back, and all the guys had their bikes out -- but mine was the only one sputtering and backfiring. I rode about 5 minutes and put it back -- the next day it went in the shop. Funny, but running a V-Twin with only one exhaust pipe having a baffle caused all sorts of problems -- the rear cylinder was running too lean (not enough gas), while the front cylinder was running too rich (too much gas) -- and the whole thing vibrated like one of the old AMF bikes. He did keep it looking nice though, so all I need to do is a little clean up when I get it back.

Then I think I may have a bike to be proud of...

don't invade myspace...

I finally set up a myspace page (tuesdayniteink) and so far, it's been nothing but an opportunity for more spam. The one friend I have is aparently a system help guy, but other than him all I've gotten is an offer for iPods and, well I forget what crap the first one was about. Fortunately I set up a new email account for myspace, so I can just ignore it most of the time. I just wish my hosting service offered white list services for the email accounts so I could loose most of the junk before it even got to me. That's the one thing Earthlink got down pretty good -- sure, it's annoying to people outside, but it does the job.

Oh well, we'll see what ends up happening with this.

Baracking the vote...

OK, I know it's early, but at this stage of the game I have to say I'm leaning towards Obama for President. The republican offerings are somewhat debatable (McCain would probably make a decent enough president, but he's got to get past Rudy G), but for the most part I'm just scared of Hillary. I mean, the naked ambition of the woman is plain dangerous -- she honestly seems to think the American people owe her the presidency. I tell you, if she loses it's going to make Faith Hill's eruption over Carrie Underwood seem trivial. This is a woman who gave up her dignity and self respect in order to further her political career (what else explains her staying with the scum ball womanizer she's married to?) This is also a lawyer with some very questionable business dealings in her history (any one remember Whitewater? It didn't hurt Bill because it was mostly Hillary's doing). She has always behaved as if she's somehow better than everyone, and if she's wrong it's not her fault. She lacks the "Ah Shucks" attitude that made her husband universally likable -- the only people who really seem to like Hillary are people like Hillary -- way too power hungry.

There's a good possibility that Obama is the same way, if so, he's got Hillary beat in not showing it. And maybe someone not so intensely entrenched in DC politics can at least shake things up a bit.

For a while...

Yes, I even have an opinion on the Oscars...

I mean, come on -- I'm a guy with a website mainly devoted to movies I've collected over the years. I just had other things on my mind this week, and now that my tooth isn't clouding my thinking (although my blood pressure medicine might still be) I can speak up.

1. Don't the folks at American Idol look like a bunch of boobs... Jennifer Hudson gets booted out well before the end of the season that crowns a guy who looks like a slightly more butch K.D. Lang as it's winner. He's made a car commercial -- Jennifer's won an Academy Award. Wonder who won that round...

2. No Borat anywhere!! It's nice to know that a movie using the same type of humour as a crank call still isn't worthy of an Oscar.

3. Helen Mirren -- well, Judi Dench can't win all the time...

4. Scorsese wins for Departed -- that's kind of got to be like the guy who had an asterisk by his name in the record books.

5. An Inconvenient Truth -- Gee, a liberal, environmentalist documentary wins an award from a liberal environmentalist industry. More like an inevitable conclusion to me.

Was there really anything worth watching last year? I think I saw more Razzie award winning films than Oscar nominated ones. Everything last year was quirky, or pretentious, or preachy. Remember when films were fun and/or escapist? That's one of the big reasons I got the projector for the family room -- I'm looking forward to the day when I can spend 12 straight hours vegetating on the couch as the entire Lord of the Rings saga plays out on the big blank wall in front of me.

Little Miss Sunshine is not a wall movie...